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Heroically Lost, Heroically Found

by Abi Grace (aka Allie LaRoe)

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October Country
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October Country The more I listen to this album, the better it gets. On first listen, Abi Grace's voice is mesmerizing, of course. But on each replay, deeper layers of talent draw your attention. The guitar arrangements are complex, and the harmonies, which I assume are Abi multi-track harmonizing with herself, are tight and beautiful, reminiscent of some of Simon & Garfunkel's best harmonies. Then on subsequent replays, you become aware of just how great these songs are lyrically. I'm out of room! Buy this LP! Favorite track: The Prodigal.
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1.
The Cycle 03:55
Looking up at a bright blue sky feeling alright in fact I'm feeling divine looking down on this shining city glass building's reflecting the sunshine to me I breath in the scent of spring rain let it wash away yesterday's pain cause I'm dancing to the rhythm of my heart beat suddenly I understand that I am complete And I want to start the cycle with you want to show you something new leave my past behind and if you're willing to open your eyes to a new kind of sight open your mind to the divine Laughter still comes after good byes The rain that nurtures us are tears from the sky the birth you're longing for comes from leaving yourself behind sometimes you can't find yourself until you've lost your mind how can you love if you never sacrifice? how can you know happiness if everything's always nice? how can you dance if you won't let your shame lie? You must leave the ground if you ever wish to fly And I want to start the cycle with you want to show you something true want to show you me and if you can look and not turn away baby don't be afraid, infinity's a scary thing And sometimes life hits low and there's no referee to call the blow but instead of crying and not doing a thing brace yourself for the pain and what tomorrow will bring dance with your skeletons and they'll never go down love life with everything and you'll never have to frown breath in the air and know the gift that it brings the new life that springs from the death of old dreams and I want to start to the cycle with you want to be renewed in the breadth of your touch if you're willing to go down a new road maybe you've traveled it before but it's still into the unknown and I want to start the cycle with you want to show you something true want to show you me if you can look and not turn away now baby don't be afraid infinity's a scary thing
2.
I want to rent a loft in Seattle and spend the rest of my life there with you we'll be dirt poor but none of that will matter because we'll have our art to get us through We'll look down on Puget Sound and I'll bring you you're coffee in bed and then we'll talk about half written songs and the latest things that we've read On Sunday Evenings I'll kidnap you from your responsibilities and take you out to the mountains we'll get in touch again talking like old friends and staring up at the heavens together we'll lie our faces turned to the sky and our hearts beating in unison and then we'll talk about then you'll pull close to me and we'll make love gently away from societies illusions We'll get old and maybe even have kids that grow up to be happy and whole and in our retirement we'll recall the time we spent in our loft in Seattle in our loft in Seattle
3.
The Prodigal 03:09
I've worn out my shoes trying to walk away my tears have all dried my hearts faded and frayed don't think I can make it another day so I spend tonight dreaming of home I've been looking to the shadows for company listening to my own voice to comfort me the road has grown cold and lonely so I'll spend tonight dreaming of home And I know that I'm in your heart there there's food a bed and a warm fire there's people who know me who always will hold me and never let me fall I've been listening to the siren's calling in the bay resisted their song for the last five days till even they gave up and swam away and I'll spend tonight dreaming of home and I chased a spector into the cold night wandered lonely meadows under the pale blue light wasted my youth on earthly delights and I'll spend tonight dreaming of home and I know that I'm in your heart there there's food a bed and a warm fire there's people who know me who always will hold me and never let me fall But the winds become my lover and the road will let me have no other so it seams I'm destined to wander and spend my nights dreaming of home
4.
I tried to fill the holes in myself with pieces of somebody else and as I fit the puzzle together I found that it didn't help and I faced my imperfections in the circus mirror of reality and discovered my shame for the weakness inherent in me I became my shadow and my ego turned and sneered I wanted to find a cure for the disappearance that I feared so I packaged you and marketed you as a perfect man I wanted some one to complete this broken heart that I had I chased our passions course with the idleness of my mind had it all planed out composed each one of your lines a play inside my mind to comfort me in my fear in hopes that dreams might salve the wounds I couldn't heal but kingdoms built on dreams are sure to topple and to fall and I couldn't maintain the false security of it all and as the castle began to crumble and the curtains to decay I felt my fears fall around me and hoped to fade away Sleeping in my apathy he found me in his way an unlikely prince charming who'd come to save the day and pull me from the dragons my cynicism had enslaved show me that magic still exists in day to day there was no completion he just handed back my heart and listened as I told him the story of how it fell apart
5.
Orpheus Bows 02:48
I have a habit of pulling away from what I love before my heart breaks a cushion of space to keep my self safe But I don't think I can run fast enough this time don't have what it takes to outdistance the fault lines and soon it will swallow me whole all of that forgotten sorrow I wasted my time pursuing perfection you were wiser for heading the other direction but now it's all come to an end I thought it was magic I could bring you to life again followed into your maddness extended an outstretched hand but I looked back my darling I looked back and I'm sorry But I have a habit of pulling away from what I love before my heart breaks a cushion of space to keep myself safe But I don't think I can run fast enough this time don't have what it takes to out distance the fault lines and soon it will swallow me whole all of that forgotten sorrow and soon it will swallow me whole all of that forgotten sorrow
6.
I woke up in a dream in which you held me I woke up in tears cause it wasn't real and it hasn't been for the last couple of years still in these moonless dreams my heart searches for a secret melody that I could sing and it would bring you back to me Oh years may go the tides turn the autumn leaves fall but I'll never forget you my love though the earth cradle you in your pall Remember when we first met it was 1932 it was a hard year but I never noticed when I was around you your eyes seemed to hold the secrets of all I wanted to know and they looked into the hidden caverns of my soul and then our wedding day nothing seems to go right but you laughed so merrily when I walked out in white we said our vows, you kissed me there carried me down the isle and our family followed suit murmuring single file Oh years may go the tides turn the autumn leaves fall but I'll never forget you my love though the earth cradle you in your pall We were going to have children but we never seemed to succeed and I was scared you'd turn to other women instead of staying sterile with me one night I lost my temper 'cause you had come home late and you listened as I poured out the fear I'd come to hate you took my hand, you kissed my palm, looked at me so seriously and said you couldn't leave any more then a fish could leave the sea Oh years may go the tides turn the autumn leaves fall but I'll never forget you my love though the earth cradle you in your pall You worked in the mill for years your hands were calloused and strong but you held me so gently at night when you came home but time is cruel the fate's spool seems to spin at a dizzying pace and arthritic hands now smooth the sheets that hold a painfully empty place Oh years may go the tides turn the autumn leaves fall but I'll never forget you my love though the earth cradle you in your pall
7.
When I was scared and ready to flee thought the hunt was after me thought they would kill me for what I am couldn't stand the thought of breaking down for them you didn't call the dogs to chase whipped those tear streaks from off of my face kept my secrets held my dreams and never asked the same of me Through wild days and the calm through the darkest nights I've known you have been a sentinel for me the promise of shore on an empty sea and I loved you even when I didn't say it to you and I loved you more then I knew how to and I loved you more then I thought I could I loved you more then you said I should So now you say you've got a big black hole and it's gnawing at your soul and you need some time to get away and some space so you can contemplate I won't call the dogs to chase I'll wipe the tear steaks from off of your face I'll keep your secrets hold your dreams you know you could always ask it of me if you return and you have changed don't ever think I'll turn you away as long as the heart of the man remains the scars you collect don't effect a thing and I loved you even when I didn't say it to you and I loved you more then I knew how to I loved you more then I thought I could I loved you more then you said I should
8.
I didn't take the straight route but it brought me back to you and now I'm staring at my ceiling trying to figure out what to do cause even distant memories have become preferable to me to being held by somebody that isn't you that isn't you And I've been self medicating with booze and cigarettes and my biggest disappointment is they haven't killed me get but if you were near me I'd quit it all for you cause you're the only person I want to wake up next to every morning would be a treasure sunkissed I'd hoard forever and I wouldn't taunt death anymore cause you're worth waking up for I've grown since you've left me my hearts learned to break and expand and I've gained enough wisdom to stop going through so many men they all seem like poor replacements distractions from the fact that I gave my love to you and there's no taking it back I can't help but cheapen it with words there's no language precious enough in this world and all my metaphors seem inadequate and cliche to express what I'm trying to stay I didn't take the straight route, but it brought me back to you....
9.
Surprise me 03:37
Surprise me show me I can believe cause I'm on my way to giving up those kinds of fantasies I can't keep believing in this kind of stuff so I'm constantly braced for disappointment like so many others I know and I avoid intimacy cause I hate to be vulnerable but coming on this morning when you've dosed off during the movie and I'm thinking to myself maybe there is more then me and I'm curling up next to you and I'm feeling your heart beating is this history repeating or are you something new Prove me wrong show me that you can be more then anyone else has been dive in deeper ignore my insecurities climb over the walls and let yourself in cause I've been hoping secretly for someone to share the spring with and I won't show it openly I'm subtle as the seasons but you're smiling at me and I'm lost in those eyes try to shut myself off but I'm seeing my demise and I'm curling up next to you and I'm feeling your heart beating is this history repeating or are you something and I can't help it if I'm in disbelief my cynicism runs runs deep and baby it's hard to believe you mean anything when it's been empty words before I need you to show me that you can be something more so delight me show me there's more then dreams cause I've been seeking unconsciousness and delight me with every little thing show me that there is more then this show me that there is more then this
10.
I don't need rings or roses to validate what we've got I don't need cards or poems that will turn to ash or rot you don't need to prove a thing to me to make this real in my mind just lay here in the silence and make the most of our time cause while we are together no matter how long it lasts we are more then just each other and the tangles of our past and as we come together we get closer to the divine as hearts try their wings one more time I don't need valliant actions to prove that you are true I don't need lists or contracts, I've put my faith in you I don't need to know you're accomplishments to love the man beneath you can take a rest baby there's nothing you've got to prove to me cause while we are together no matter how long it lasts we are more then just each other and the tangles of our past and as we come together we get closer to the diving as hearts try their wings one more time You don't need to promise forever if it's something that you can't keep we don't need to be always together in order to be complete I don't want to finish your sentances I'd rather compose my own the nights I spend with you mean more cause of those I've spent alone and while we are together no matter how long it lasts we are more then just each other and the tangles of our pasts and as we come together we get closer to the divine as heart's try their wings one more time.

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released November 15, 2009

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Abi Grace (aka Allie LaRoe) Seattle, Washington

Abi Grace also known as Allie LaRoe. Front woman and songwriter for The Feral Folk, passion advocate, magic enthusiast. Also likes wine.

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